Today marks exactly 25 months since we lost Cyndi. She continues to guide both Jackie and I through life. Cyndi was a unique person and her spirit lives on through Jackie's smile, through the wag of a guide dog's tail, and in my memory. I find that when I feel beaten down by life or depressed because things are hard, I remember Cyndi's bravery as she faced the world each day knowing that it could be her last. Those who knew her were truly inspired by her. Jackie and I have tried to keep in contact with Cyndi's close friends because Cyndi gravitated towards other people with strong spirits.
If I had a chance to talk to Cyndi, I would tell her we miss her and we love her. I would tell her that our baby girl has blossomed into a fine young woman. I would tell her that she was right about so many things we had argued about. Somehow I sense she knows these things. I would tell her that I learned so much from my two decades with her I would want Cyndi to know that I am in love again. I do not believe news of my new love would make Cyndi sad, since she would want me to be happy and her only concern in that area was that any new woman in my life be good to Jackie. Sue is good to Jackie, and that Sue's kids have given Jackie the experience of having brothers and sisters that she longed for.
See bottom of this page for the latest news.
My wonderful wife, Cythina Luanne Gibb Sadowsky passed away on June 17, 2005. Cyndi was a fantastic mother to Jackie, now 15 years-old. Cyndi died at OHSU hospital in the ICU ward with Jackie and I at her side. Cyndi had been battling two chronic diseases for nearly two decades.
Cyndi was a kind and charitable person. She was involved in Jackie's high school, she helped raise guide dogs for the blind, and she did volunteer work for the Citizen Review Board (CRB). CRB is a group of local civilians who made recommendations in family court in custody disputes and other legal matters. Cyndi encouraged our daughter Jackie to volunteer for guide dogs, at the zoo, and work on political campaigns. Cyndi's life was focused on being a great mom, a responsible citizen, a wonderful wife, and giving back to the community.
Given Cyndi's charitable nature, please send gifts to honor her to American Association of Autoimmune Related Diseases (http://www.aarda.org) in Cyndi's name or contribute to Guide Dogs for the Blind (www.guidedogs.com).
Cyndi enjoyed her final months. In her final week she saw Jackie's performances in her school play as well as the Night at the Opera. Jackie has been a source of joy for both of us for 15 years straight. Despite her serious illnesses, Cyndi spent most of her time happy and glad to have Jackie and I in her life. We were glad to have Cyndi.
Cyndi is responsible for our involvement in Guide Dogs for the Blind. She dreamed of raising a guide dog puppy since she was a little girl. Cyndi attended meetings for over a year, with Jackie, in San Jose before adopting our first guide dog. Our first one, Ruffles, graduated and lives with a blind man in Washington. Cyndi was too weak to take the stage at the graduation, but she watched as Jackie and I greeted Ted Clough and presented him with Ruffles.
On Saturday, June 25, 2005 a memorial service was held in Beaverton. The service was very touching. A slide show of Cyndi was played on the video while special versions of three songs played. The three songs were picked for Cyndi, and performed by Rich. Later in the service a slide show of our daughter Jackie played with Jackie singing "Who I Am", a country song that Cyndi loved especially when Jackie performed it. The songs can be found below. Rich, Jackie, and Cyndi's siblings Tamara and Danny spoke about Cyndi. Others in the group also spoke of Cyndi including Alice Check, Nancy Prewitt, David Sadowsky and others.
Cyndi's spirit lives on through our beautiful daughter and our guide dog puppies. Clarabelle, our second guide dog puppy, has advanced to level 8 of 10 in advanced training. See Clarabelle.
Who I Am - performed by Jackie with Rich on guitars
Brown Eyed Girl - performed by Rich
Your Song - performed by Rich on guitar and vocals
Mamas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Cowboys - performed by Rich on guitars and vocals
The picture at the top of this page is Cyndi and I shortly after we starting dating around 1985. The picture was taken in Colorado Springs at the train that goes to the top of Pikes Peak. Below it is Cyndi, Ruffles and I on our way to a company holiday party in 2003.
You can email me here if you need more information on any of the charities listed above
The following poem was sent to me by La Donna. La Donna's mom, Janice from OK, passed away on the same day as Cyndi. I knew Janice and met La Donna on diabeticgourmet.com type 2 diabetes forum. I am a type 2 diabetic. This poem is lovely. The author is unknown:
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It has been a little over a month since Cyndi passed away. Jackie and I are still coming to grips with it. Jackie has been so strong and wonderful. Cyndi raised a great kid. I feel truly blessed to have had Cyndi for nearly 20 years and to have such a special daughter.
Things will never be the same for us. But we are moving forward with fond memories. Jackie and I both knew this was coming. Over the last year it had become clear that despite Cyndi's strength she could not fight forever. Reflecting on things Cyndi said in the last week, I realize now that she knew the time had come.
Something Cyndi said 3 days before she died has really helped me through. I was helping with her medicines and heating up her tea. She said "you have been so nice to me." I said "do you mean today?" She answer, "no, I mean always." I don't think anything anyone has said to me was as sweet as that comment. I am happy beyond words that she felt that way.
September 2005
Jackie just started her sophomore year in high school. This is the first time she has been in school since losing her mom. Cyndi went into the hospital on the last day of school last year, and passed away the next day. So Jackie and I venture into the year alone. Most of the teachers and students did not know. We have informed them and they have made a few minor changes to Jackie's schedule to help us out.
Jackie went to her horseback camp on one of the San Juan islands off the coast near Seattle and the Canadian border. She had fun, but was thrown from a horse and got stepped on by the horse. So she has been on crutches for last couple of weeks. What a bummer for her. She has suffered quite a few setbacks in the last few months, but she is a trouper and keeps on keeping on! Jackie spend several weeks back in New England over the summer to be with family. She was mostly with my sister near the beach in Fairfield Connecticut. I spent some time in New England as well.
The company I co-founded around Dec 2004 is finally getting some traction and has some customers. While this is great, being an executive at a growing startup requires travel, which is difficult as a single parent. Somehow we have been making it work. On top of being a single parent, we are still raising a guide dog for the blind named Amiga. Between Amiga's special needs and the other 4 pets, we have our hands full. I spent about a small fortune on dog kennels this summer.
To date, about 1000 people have accessed this memorial page for Cyndi. So many wonderful people have contacted us. Cyndi made so many friends over her lifetime. I am keeping this site alive at the request of many of those friends.
January 2006
This was a huge month for us. Jackie turned 16. Cyndi never expected to live to see Jackie's 15th birthday, but she did. We felt her presence on Jackie's 16th birthday. Jackie is the most wonderful young woman. Cyndi lives on through our beautiful daughter.
In January 2006 we also began preparations for a major life altering event. We are moving back east. I have been working in downtown Boston for several months. Both Cyndi and I were raised on the east coast. Cyndi grew up in New Jersey and I grew up in Connecticut. There's more news coming on this so stay tuned.
February 2006
I don't know if anyone is still reading this. If so, email me so I know it is worthwhile to keep updating it. We are busy packing up the house. For now, we are keeping the house in Oregon. From Jackie's point of view, it is a lasting memory of her mom. From my point of view, it is that AND a sound investment. For those who have never been here, it is a fantastic 4000 square foot house at the summit of an extinct volcano with a one acre yard. From the front porch and kitchen you can see Mount St. Helens and on a really clear day Mt. Rainier 250 miles away near Seattle.
The process of packing the house and sorting through Cyndi's stuff was very emotional. We are donating most of her clothes to the woman's shelter in Portland. One of Jackie's teachers suggested that. Cyndi was quite a feminist and would love the idea of her clothes helping battered and homeless woman. Jackie had the difficult task of sorting through the clothes. Today is Feb 11, 2006 and we are a few days away from a moving van arriving here.
While it may seem inappropriate to mention on Cyndi's memorial page, I have fallen in love again. I feel it is OK to discuss that here because Cyndi and I had discussions about what I would do after she was gone. As most of you know now, we have known for over a decade that Cyndi was dying. Cyndi asked me to do one thing. She wanted me to make sure whoever I was with was good to Jackie. Sue is wonderful to Jackie.
I have created a Family News page that has info on Jackie and I, as well as news of our new life with Sue in Massachusetts.
Thanks to Donna D. and Ginny B. for contacting me. Here are pictures of Sue and I as teenagers on our way to proms.